Hello, God. Are you there?

Hello, God. I know you’re busy and all, but I needed to let you know I’m not really happy with you. See, being as how you supposedly created man in your image and all, one would think you’d have created man to be a tad wiser. I’m not really sure what happened, but you may have noticed they created this thing called religion. Presumably, it was to workshop you and keep everything down here in check. Now, if that is true, that makes you one narcissistic, controlling, asshole. You know that, right? So, I’m gonna go on a limb here and guess that’s not it. Or at least I’m gonna hope it’s not.

Anyhow, this religion thing has pretty much fucked up everyone I know to some degree. The ones still believing in it and engaged in it aren’t necessarily the nicest, most open minded folk (a few exceptions to every rule). And the ones who’ve given it up has spent a ton of time and energy in trying to get over the damage done by the church and its members. in the name of you.

There’s all these wars going on, illness, famine, genocide, greed, abuse, murder, global warming, economic collapse, poverty, rape, every -ism you could imagine. I wonder how could this be happening if we’re created in your image? And I have to scratch my head because there’s a whole lot here on this planet that is so incredible and miraculous that of course it has to be in the Omnipresent One’s image.

I gotta wonder, God, do we have it all wrong?

What if you’re not “out there” somewhere, presumably on vacation, checked out to the reality of what’s happening “down here”? What if you’re in each of us, experiencing the vast possibilities through each of us- the shadows and the light?

What if you don’t exist at all and I’m just talking to nothing?

Yoga tells me that I have to practice Ishvara Pranidhana or the study of God. But I don’t even know how to do that because I can’t even truly figure out if you exist or not. Most times I make peace with a believe system I have that we are all a piece of God, but really, I don’t know. And I gotta say it sucks even saying that because I want to know. I think most of us want to know, which makes this all the crazier.

When I look at the forest, listen to the birds, and notice all that is alive in the forest, or when I contemplate the human body, I feel like there’s got to be something greater, some shared heart beat that breathes life into this world. It’s all just to complex and simple to have just “happened.”

Study God. There was a show called “John from Cincinnati” where the lead character touched Kai’s forehead and said, “See God, Kai.” And she saw a montage of images, pleasant and not-so-pleasant that left her reeling. Maybe to study you, I have to study me. Maybe I have to “see God” in everyone and accept our choices- both aware and unaware- as a part of you… and a part of all of us.

Which leads me to the question of if I am willing to be God? We judge people who claim they are God as mentally ill. Hell, maybe they are. Who in their right mind would voluntarily own that level of responsibility beyond say, Donald Trump? To be you, I have to be aware. I have to see myself in everyone and sometimes that just plan sucks. I don’t want to see me in the serial killer, the homophobic “Christian”, the terrorist, the racist, the pedophile. I don’t want to see myself in the starving children, the abused woman, the father of four diagnosed with cancer. Because I can’t explain why that is happening. I can’t explain why choices are being made. I can’t control anything and certainly, if anyone can control anything, wouldn’t it be God?

Maybe you’ll give me some epic sign of your existence or share some incredible insight with me long before I die. I’d happily share it, though I’d probably be carted to the mental hospital, wouldn’t I? Maybe it’s safer not knowing. Or maybe not. All I know is that if Jesus were alive today, he’d be hanging out at a bar long before he’d walk in a church. So maybe that’s is a far more appropriate place to contemplate these questions. Cheers.